Best & Worst Celebrity Camel Toes – A Hoof Stomping Good Time! Celebrity Ungulates

Ungulate:

1. Hoofed mammals such as camels, cattle, and swine. 2. Having hooves. 3. Resembling hooves; hooflike.

There are numerous breeds and ages of celebrity ungulates that roam throughout the concrete jungles of Los Angeles and New York.

Wildlife can be beautiful, but it can also be filled with horrible cruelty. Life in the concrete jungles can be tough for these pampered creatures. Enjoy the wildlife!

Kate Beckinsale is a vivacious ungulate with wide open plains in front of her. She'll be stomping that hoof for a long time to come!

Ashanti is a fighting ungulate. Here we see her using her defensive posture. Flapping her arms and thrusting her hoof forward in an attempt to scare off predators.

Britney Spears is a naive ungulate. Paying no attention to her surroundings, leaving her hoof completely exposed for attack.

Brooke Hogan is a fearless ungulate. Prancing her hoof all about while spewing guttural sounds to all who will listen.

Heidi Klum is an alpha ungulate. Strong and fierce, she stands amongst her herd with hoof ready to attack.

Jessica Simpson is a cautious ungulate. Here we see her pulling on her blue hoof holder, making certain her hoof is snuggly protected from the elements.

Miley Cyrus is a young ungulate just beginning to explore the grazing grounds. In the wild, young ungulates are forced to grow up quickly. Even though not yet fully developed, Miley is proudly displaying her hoof and position in the celebrity herd.

Mischa Barton is a battered but not beaten ungulate. Although her hoof has clearly been trampled, she some how manages the strength to limp through the concrete jungle.

Pamela Anderson was once an ungulate of great beauty, whose hoof glistened in the sunshine. These days it takes an army of personal hoof assistants to get her hoof to shine for even the briefest moment. It's definitely time to set this ungulate out to pasture.

Paris Hilton is a dim witted ungulate that has over exposed her hoof on numerous occasions. Most ungulates shy away from the predators of the concrete jungle, but this celebrity ungulate repeatedly taunts them with her hoof.

Rebecca Romjin is a captured ungulate. This graphic image shows Rebecca's hoof being spot lighted by ungulate hunters. It is clear that her hoof has been netted.

Linda Carter is a rarely seen species of the ungulate family (scientific name Wonderous Womanous). Dawning a sleek blue coat this tough and hearty ungulate revels in showing off it's powerful blue hoof. It's clear this hoof was made for stomping!

Rent a Dog – The Latest Fashion Rental Commodity

I constantly see celebrities like Paris Hilton walking around with dogs and using them as accessories.  Now with the help of the new company Flexpetz,  celebs don't even have to pretend they care about the dogs peeking out of their Hermes hand bags.

What a huge relief this must be for Hollywood.  With locations in San Francisco, NYC, Chicago, Paris, and London they can match their dog to the perfect outfit. 

Dogs can be rented from just a few hours to days.  If you have the money, then this company has the pooch.  What an ingenious way to suck the responsibility out of being a dog owner.

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The Biggest Celebrity Oops

Where do I begin. Ever since there have been celebrities there have been photographers waiting in the wings to catch the infamous celebrity oops picture. Celebrities caught in compromising situations, and slip-ups happen all the time.

Celebrity oops don't just happen because of paparazzi, they often come directly out of the mouths of the celebrities themselves. The biggest celebrity oops are almost always attributed to celebrities not knowing when to shut up.

For some reason celebrities from every genre think they have an opinion that matters. Maybe that is why celebrity oops happen so frequently. With news channels on 24/7 you can bet it will be a top story. Nothing brings out the hyena's like a good celebrity oops story. Ratings go up, and the public goes on a gossip frenzy. The fact the celebrity oops has nothing to do with real news and world importance is of no consequence to reporters and their news stations.

Some of the largest celebrity oops and big time screw ups are:

Paris Hilton's celebrity oops for just about everything. From nipple slips, dui's, driving without a license and going in and out of jail.

Don Imus' celebrity oops for calling the Rutgers womens basketball team 'nappy-headed whoes.

Lindsay Lohan's celebrity oops for partying and getting caught on video snorting cocaine.

Britney Spears' celebrity oops for just completely losing her junk. Going to rehab, shaving her head and attacking paparazzi.

Mel Gibson's celebrity oops for his drunken uncontrollable swearing and anti-semitic ramblings.

Keith Urban's celebrity oops for his drug and alchohol problem, visiting rehab yet again.

Tom Cruise's celebrity oops for being a total nut job. Ranting on Oprah and on the Today Show saying that there is no such thing as a chemical imbalance.

Naomi Campbell's celebrity oops for anger management and throwing a cell phone at an assistant.

Mary-Kate Olsen's celebrity oops for her anorexia and cocaine addicted trips to rehab.

Rush Limbaugh's celebrity oops for fraudulently obtaining prescription drugs.

Rosie O'Donnell's celebrity oops for just not knowing when to shut the hell up.

Gweneth Paltro's celebrity oops for saying British people are "more intelligent and civilized" than Americans.

Paris Hilton Back in Jail

Paris' freedom was short lived, when Judge Sauer ordered her back to jail to finish her full term.  When the order came across Paris immediately began sobbing hysterically, and said "It's not right! then, looking to her mom she sobbed "Mom!, Mom!". 

At no time did I approve of the defendant being released from custody to her home. "I don't know why the defendant could not be treated at Lynwood, because they have a great medical facility." says Judge Sauer.

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Paris ordered Back to Court

Paris Hilton is due in court at 9am with the possibility of being returned back to jail.  "My understanding is she will be brought in in a sheriff's vehicle from her home," says Superior Court spokesman Allan Parachini.

Late Thursday afternoon the city attorney filed a petition demanding  the cause of Paris' changed punishment, and to learn if Sherriff Lee Baca should be held in contempt of court for releasing Hilton.

There is currently no order for Sherrif Baca to attend court.

Paris had the opportunity to gain some respect from the public by biting the bullet and just doing her time, exactly like the rest of us would have to. She even went in early, not something most of us would do. We all like seeing celebs take responsibility for their actions - but we don't mind burning them at the stake as well. 

When word spread of Paris' release the public was mad as hell, and they didn't hesitate to let the world know it.

"What transpired here is outrageous," county Supervisor Don Knabe told The Associated Press, adding he received hundreds of phone calls from all over the country and more than 400 angry e-mails.

This story has become so mainstream that it is no longer about Paris Hilton, but the special treatment the priveldeged receive over everyone else. Paris has made so many people angry with this stunt, that the heat is barreling down on politicians everywhere.  I think she is headed back to the slammer.

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Prosperous Paris out of Peril

Free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty Paris is free at last!

After 3 torturous days in the clink, Paris has been fitted with a new piece of ankle jewelry and reassigned to house arrest.  Paris was released from jail due to medical reasons he could not discuss due to confidentiality laws says Steve Whitmore, the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Dept. spokesperson.

Whitmore emphatically stated that Paris was not released early, but only reassigned.  Technically, Paris is still in custody and will be confined to her West Hollywood home for 40 days. 

Paris' jail cell was 96 square feet and now she has a 3000-4000 foot radius of couch sitting, food delivering, tv watching freedom.

For the rest of the world, staying in a mansion with amenities up the wazoo is considered a luxury & a dream vacation.  According to Whitmore after her 40 days are up Paris will have fulfilled her debt to society.  How out of touch is our legal system?

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paris hilton

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